I could have been playing "Guess the Girth"

I was invited to a baby shower yesterday after church, but S and I really wanted to spend the afternoon at the Water Country already had plans to celebrate his birthday in a special way. So I politely declined. And, as it turned out, the shower was cancelled anyway because the hostess gave such short notice that people couldn't change their plans many people have crazy travel schedules during summer.

But, wouldn't you know it, who do S and I run into as we are sneaking out the door early from departing the 8AM service? The proud parents to be!

I managed to keep a very excited S from insensitively blurting out our water park destination, which took precedence over a celebration of their first-born disclosing our prior commitment while I vaguely made it sound like we had some dignified engagement to attend out of town gave our regrets.

This incident made me think about just how often I present a censored account of things.

In a previous posting on the famous Coca-Cola cake, I gave a brief sample of my daily self-editing for you in my "on the inside"/"on the outside" conversation in Story #1. In today's posting, I will offer you sanitized snippets from our trip to the waterpark while retaining the more colorful (if not off-color) version behind the nifty strike-through feature. Enjoy!

Editor's note: While the cleaned-up version is indeed presented below, please be advised that the original version may not be suitable for all audiences. Parents, please use discretion!

S and I spent a frigid mild, gloomy overcast afternoon at Water Country by the NH seacoast being visually assualted by taking in body tattoos and piercings local art and observing individuals sporting gang-symbols tribal markings.

This was truly a cultural experience, as we were in way too close contact mingled with a wide spectrum of uninhibited expressive people groups cursing like sailors speaking a variety of dialects.

A couple of choice examples will suffice:
When her friend came to her senses and chickened out of reconsidered their decision to take the Double Geronimo 58-foot drop together, a fleshy, over-exposed broad scantily-clad female screamed out called to the desertor: "When I get down from here, I'm gonna slash you! Wow, I'm really hurt you would abandon me at a moment like this! Now I'm gonna be all by myself while I sh#% the whole way down I have no one else to blame for this dumb decision."

Behind us in line for the Double Dive Boggan, a highschool hussy young trollop with loose questionable morals exclaimed in front of two horny male teens in mixed company that she was so cold that her "nipples breasts were hard". The clencher was when she squealed with delight that this brought her some attention was offended that they checked her out to verify her statement!!

Clearly, these are people who do not second-guess their choice of words and would therefore have little use for the strike-through feature. Yet, I can't help but wonder...didn't their mama raise them better?? Have they no sense of propriety??

As my title suggests, I could have spent the afternoon playing silly shower games like "Guess the Girth." But where we were, there was nothing left to the imagination.

Although we loved the huge selection of water thrills, S and I cut our visit short. For only $26.99/each with his corporate discount, there was FAR too much exposure for my gentle, tender S and me.

Buyer, beware!